Lonely planet

by PorcelainMoon   Mar 17, 2014


Trees are breathing with the life you lost, so long ago. Moonlight is light enough to remind you we are alone. The folds of the human mind, still incomprehensible and bleak. Freedom and forgiveness, choose to serve the meek. It's all just a blur. Time repeats and you sleep, you sleep long enough to kill the pain, wake long enough to feel disdain. Walk till your feet hurt, in the blood and the rain...

Empty pill boxes, burnt cigarettes. No hope, no love. Worms and maggots taste the success of human kind, while the living chase the happiness that only exists within nature. The liberty of man stolen by money, while the lonely planet spins in the darkness.

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Latest Comments

  • 10 years ago

    by Baby Rainbow

    I do not like the layout of the poem, I find it puts people off reading the poem when they see it all together, I am not sure why this is. Layout should not matter, and yet it does.

    But I suggest you change it, just space it out more so it is a bit easier on the eye. I am so glad I read this because your words are great, and fit together well. The flow is actually really good, and the meaning is strong and relevant to the world, and how it is changing, and what the causes are of the pain and loneliness in the world.

    I thought you done a brilliant job with the message of your poem, and also your title.

    My only small issue is just the layout, but I hope other reader's will give the poem a chance if you do not change this.

    Nice work.

  • 10 years ago

    by earlgreytea

    Wow. This is lovely, keep up the great work! :)

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