On the boozy banks of Loch Tay

Wee wee fishy fishy
Will ya jump into my arms
Ken, I have fallen for all your charms

Ken , thou art more pouty
than Angelina Jolie
and more watery
than a weekend in Kirkcaldy

Ken, thou art more scaly
than my mother-in-law
And more slippery
than politicians during war

Wee wee fishy fishy
Will ya jump into my arms
Ken, I have fallen for all your charms

Wee means small, Ken means understand