Comments : Kitchen table gossip

  • 7 years ago

    by BlueJay

    I love the imagery in this and how you not only created a memory but let me be a part of that in a way. The first stanza is my favorite because I love how you worded it and I relate to it - I think a lot of people can actually.

    Anyway, Nice piece! A great one to read!

  • 7 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    I doubt if anyone can beat the imagery of this well written poem

    • 7 years ago

      by Dixiedaisy

      Awww Thank you Michael, that's a very sweet compliment.

  • 7 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    Love the title, Kay! The scene is welcoming and unique. I like how you give the actual time and this coffee/gossip time has become such a habit. Then there's that curious girl wondering about these women, the wonders of the world, the latest gossip.

  • 7 years ago

    by Larry Chamberlin

    You are so right: poetry takes on a life of its own. In this case you have imbued your work with richness and vivid imagery that sets the table with perfect clarity, from the matching creamer and sugar to the "ribbons of autumn, / drenching the morning / with memories of momma."

    You elegantly describe the progression of the entrance: first the timely sedan under the pine, the creaking of the door springs, the cigarette (bet you could smell the smoke) and the daily repeated joke. I feel like I could do a screenplay without changing anything.

    Your narrative draws me along with your younger self - wanting to hear that gossip. It was probably mixtures of joyous laughter, low-whispered shock at the foibles of the locals and quiet appreciation of a good friend.

    I am so happy you have begun to write again. Please, give us more!

  • 7 years ago

    by Dark Secrets

    I like the link you made between your childhood and coffee, the feelings of nostalgia your poem gave me and how you progressed within the poem... Great write! And good luck!

  • 7 years ago

    by Cindy

    Kay
    I love to read your poetry. This has the memory of your momma I know how much you miss her. I love the little story held inside this piece.

    Vintage creamer cow paired
    with matching sugar dish,
    serve as centerpieces
    for table and for gossip
    long before computers would

    My mamaw had a pig. I remember visits to her house as a child and smelling the coffee...everything centered around the kitchen table. Laying in bed you could hear the murmur of conversation but not quite make out the words. So I understand where you would have to sneak closer.

    Excellent job!
    Take care
    Love Cindy

  • 7 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    Hello Kay,

    I am not sure about ' a little rough' In my mind you have executed this initial challenge into a superb nostalgic poem.

    I love how you set the scene, Autumn symbolising a stage in life when we can easily drift back in time, to places in our minds when life was more carefree. Anyway to wonderful smell of coffee beans, thick 'saturated' in the air. This is my favourite smell, oh and bacon of course.

    As your mind casts back, you paint a picture of the set table, right down to the dishes. These dishes undoubtedly used throughout your childhood; and I like to think you still have them, or other heirlooms like them.

    The mystery lady, old, fragile. I also like the way her bones are echoed in the door hinge. Nice touch. Anyway, this lady who would come across to a young girl as a wise lady, a lady who must have much to say to 'momma'

    ...and she does. I can almost see the girl, straining in body and ear canal to hear the conversation, trying to understand the mystery of 'grown ups. The joke lifts this is a pleasant way. A joke that the little girl would more that likely still be puzzled at, but allows the reader to smile at her sweet innocence and the frail ladies humor.

    A wonderful poem that is going straight into my favourites.

    Thank you.

    Take care,

    Michael

  • 7 years ago

    by Maple Tree

    Congratulations sweet lady, this is a beautiful piece!

  • 7 years ago

    by Cindy

    Kay
    Congratulations on the win. This was such a wonderful poem. Took me back in time so m any wonderful memories.
    Love Cindy

  • 7 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Hello, Kay
    This really is a wonderful piece and entirely deserving of the win it received! Well done and all the very best,
    Ben

  • 6 years ago

    by Maple Tree

    Judging comment

    It's so refreshing and a pleasure to have Dixiedaisy writing and posting again, this poem is beautiful!

    This poem takes the reader to the comforts of home, to the simplistic moments that at the time seam ritual but when a loved one passes on, these are the moments to be cherished and preserved, into an elegant poem such as this piece.

    Her attention to imagery and detail is wonderfully displayed within each and every stanza. I do love the classy wording she has used within this piece! Powerful and emotional poem as well. Just beautiful!!

  • 5 years ago

    by PETER EDWARDS

    Nice work Dixiedaisy, although my comments are belated. It's good to see that you wrote more poems after this one. I look froward to reading them!