Damaged goods (Waltz Wave) (HM)

by Mr. Darcy   Dec 6, 2015


Breathe
out, in...
Air
Chokes these
Haunting sins,
Tighter
'till
I can
hear my heart;
each weakening
beat further...
apart.
Bright
light gleamed
before he:
Raped the
last
Breath from
...me

michael
2015

WALTZ WAVE

This form, named for Leo Waltz, the Web Manager of Sol Magazine, asks for a one-stanza titled poem, with nineteen lines; each line has a set number of syllables.

Pattern: 1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4, 3, 2, 1, 2, 3, 2, 1, 2, 1

Words may be split into syllables to fit the pattern. This form seems to educe a soothing cadence as the lines gently increase and decrease, so it is suggested that topic chosen for this form also be soothing. Although, poetic license allows for greater scope.

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Latest Comments

  • 8 years ago

    by BlueJay

    This is very interesting to read, though I must say I had to read it quite a few times before I fully understood what you were trying to say. Wonderfully penned, great style choice - you pulled it off well. And I enjoyed reading this very thoroughly.

    (Still a little speechless, will come back soon with a real comment.)

  • 8 years ago

    by Ingrid

    Beautifully crafted, Michael.
    To me this format seemed ideal for a romantic poem (did one some years back), but it also works well with this dark subject, haunting and melodramatic.

    Well done!

    (((hugs))) xx

  • 8 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Michael
    The description in this piece is outstanding -
    "each weakening beat further apart" and ...."before he: raped the last breath from me" are both excellent lines and highly effective here.
    As usual, a clever and original piece from you and one I will be nominating tomorrow!
    All the very best,
    Ben

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