Good God, man, this is an immense write in every way. The rhyming and syllable count are spot on throughout (I use eight syllables per line a lot myself) and the story is engrossing and tragic all at once.

I hope someone nominates this - I am out of votes already!

Take care and well done on this,

SL

Hi guys,

I got this one. A worthy nomination from me.

Good luck!

Take care,

Michael

Many times when we write of the past, the emotion oozes out and creates a top notch emotional and heart gripping poem.. ugh I cried with this poem, just got me!

I'm lost for words what a sad but honest piece.

Hugs and take care, Em

Stephen, I'm blown away-this is incredibly sad and beautifully written. I can't even begin to describe how many emotions ran through me and still are after reading this. Well done!

Good work S

Thank you all!

Incredibly emotional and visual poem. So strong and really touches a note. Milly xx

I've been away from all of you guys, especially you my Turtle King, but this is the kind of work that makes me roil with emotion. I like how you keep mystery in the words, but the experience of regret and pain transfers to whomever is reading them. I can't offer much on constructive criticism because I love how you did this. I hope that, if this is an actuality of your life, you can find calm waters to let your regrets be cooled and healed.

Beautiful and saddening. You know a work is great when it makes you feel such emotions strongly. This was an excellent piece and definitely a new favorite!

Hello,

Again, your use of the English language is the key in your work, but I shan't delve into that again.

The story was unique and intriguing, but it did - at times - feel a little forced, but I think that was down to the rhyme scheme that you'd chosen. I think it's rather difficult to not come across slightly forced when one chooses this form. But as I said, it was slight.

Regards,

Bradley