It will do

I can't decide if I'm empty or hollow,
After all there's nothing left for me to do,
I had one job and I failed miserably,
It's all my fault I lost you.

The tv is on but I hear no sound,
I stare at the white walls of my bedroom in a daze,
My mind is spinning out of control,
Tears streaking makeup down my face.

It hasn't even been a week but yet it still hurts,
I've done nothing but cry in bed,
I haven't been able to sleep but I still try;
Closing my eyes, your name bounces around in my head.

I ache for my razor but I promised you I wouldn't,
So I opt for a cigarette instead,
'So much for quitting' I think to myself
I tried to turn my life around and this is where I was led.

My limbs feel heavy and my throat is raw from screaming,
My headaches just won't go away,
If this is life without you then I don't want to be here,
I don't want to live another day.

How can I survive this unbearable pain,
My mind focusing on questions, the answers unknown;
I roll over the soft white bedsheets,
We had come so far, we had grown.

I want to nothing more than to hold you in my arms,
You're all I see in my dreams at night,
I have to believe that things will get better,
That at the end of this tunnel, there's a light.

Curling in a ball and pretending my pillow is you,
I slow my breathing and wipe my tears,
I whisper an almost inaudible "I love you"
And pray that somehow you will hear.

We can do this I know we can,
We just have to make it through,
I only get to see you in my dreams
But for now that's enough, it will do.