Jane, this write is awesome, I think that many people feel as you do and can really relate to this, when someone is religious and loses faith or an element of it at least they can feel incredibly lost and vulnerable in other ways, literally praying for their faith to return to them (oxymoranic as that may sound to some) and it can be very hard for them to deal with. Eventhough after some of the things I've written about gods and religion it obvious where I stand but I totally empathise with people who face this struggle, because it can turn their world into a very unforgiving place for them for a while and that isn't something I wish for people. Kudos on this write, it is wonderful.
Jane, I really liked this a lot. Quite a quandary to be in. I myself don't actively attend organized religion anymore, I guess I am more spiritual now. You really hit on the difficulty of never seeing your loved ones again but at the same time changing your own personal thoughts in order to do so. Tough spot you did really well.
I think these feelings and thoughts are what make us human. I find myself having these types of conversations with my husband and my brother, as they're the only ones I know won't pass negative judgement like the rest of my family. Lol
Anyway, I truly enjoyed the honesty in this. Thank you for sharing!
I had missed your writes so much and you sharing this with us, just, wow. Those last two lines, yes. I simply wish you comfort and peace no matter if you do end up having your own testimony/witness to God or not. It's not something that can be forced, but something deeply personal. It's heavy and I hope you feel you do not have to carry all the burden, all the weight, alone.
4 years ago
I'm not sure how I managed to miss this! I see this being something that has been on your heart a lot lately, and I've been praying heavily for you to find the clarity you're seeking. It's a personal journey, a hard one sometimes, but exciting all at once. I once asked God to show me He was real, kind of a "PROVE IT, MISTER" sort of way, and my God did He show up. It's a weird ride for sure! Love you, sweet friend, and I am so grateful for our friendship.
It's a difficult situation once you come to realize that you cannot just accept religious beliefs. If you are having trouble with this, feel free to message me. I am part of an organization called Atheist Atheist Alliance of America.