Comments : 3.78 cm per year.

  • 3 years ago

    by Star

    I have to start with how genius the title is, if I'm correct it the distance at which the moon drifts away from earth. That itself is a statement. And also for some reason it feels like you haven't written something like this poem for a while. Loved the first line, its smart too!! There is so much to take from it, and so many parts that left me wandering why you chose the wording (I mean that in a good way :p).

    Like here:
    "at various ends of the world – at the end of your world
    and the beginning of mine."

    Why is it the beginning of your world and the end of theirs, and not the other way around? Is it because it's on going for you, but not them? Or is there more to it, whatever it is it just intrigues us the readers and we want to read on. It felt like he beginning of a good story, if that makes any sense.

    The wording is especially beautiful in some parts, like how you ended the first part " you’re already brewing with art". Brewing with art I dont think I've read this anywhere else, or I need to read more :p

    And then another unique part/take of mirrors, having no reflection and stealing glances from other's mirrors. Thats so powerful gave me chills. Without even mentioning pitiful, it's sad on its own.

    Vacated star; this reminded me of the story of The Little Prince. And from that to the following two parts. They felt so tied together. The little prince left his planet and flower looking for more, though he knew he'd return to where he belongs. Just like here, the places they both visited still full of ligh full of hope even though it's sad there, there's a glimpse of hope it's where you feel belong.

    Then you see reality or what you picture it, it's very hurtful and sad. But why when there's hope do you feel things are over? Though for them it's beautiful.

    There's a so much more to this piece, it's powerful and pack so many varying emotions!!

    sorry if I rambled a lot :p

  • 3 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    Congratulations, I can't believe I forgot to 'like' this.

  • 3 years ago

    by Everlasting

    You know? It’s funny. I’ve been trying to figure out who the narrator is in this piece. I can only think that is a vampire because

    Vampires have no reflection
    Vampires are in places where there’s no sun

    I meant the entire time the narrator seems to compare this someone to both the moon and the sun. Which means, that if he sees her, he will ceases to exists so better not call her name else she may appear, on the other hand, she seems to be like the moon where he is safe to come out but I guess better not risk it.

    I search for Red Earth and a video game was the only thing that popped up in my search. A vampire name demitric maximoff also came as one of my searches.

    I just thought it was interesting. I have no idea what this poem is about. But I do like the voice. Congrats in the win.

    • 3 years ago

      by prasanna

      You have a lovely way of thinking about things Luce. I'm not too sure myself about what the poem is about, but as for "red earth", it's in reference to a translated poem:

      "What could my mother be
      to yours? What kin is my father
      to yours anyway? And how
      Did you and I meet ever?
      But in love
      our hearts have mingled
      as red earth and pouring rain."

      as translated by A.K. Ramanujan.

      Thank you all!