Comments : Prisoners

  • 6 months ago

    by BOB GALLO

    I did not get the last part, The knee??
    But the rest of the poem was awesome. Very pro with description and imageries. Refreshing poetical perspective.

    • 6 months ago

      by D.

      It was about surrendering :) thanks for your comment! Always appreciated

  • 6 months ago

    by Everlasting

    I also didn’t understand the last part. Until I read your comment.

    When I think about not surrendering… I guess I think of it more as weak knees not giving up.

    So I was trying to word your stanza in different ways so that I could perhaps picture it. This is what I came up with

    How many knees do you think will surrender to the ground?

    Or how many knees would weaken to the cause?

    But ahh, I can feel it but I can’t come up with the right words lol.

    No knees will surrender to the ground despite bruises and cracks? ( this is too wordy)

    But I mean, the reason I couldn’t see what you meant is because I’m expecting bruises and cracks. Unless the prisoners are super humans? In a way, I feel like it’s more believable to have bruises and cracks and the knees not giving up yet , due to the persons spirit’s not wanting to give up on the cause.? May be i don’t make sense.

    Anyways, I like your poem.

    The above are not suggestions. I’m just trying to leave a comment explaining why I feel it didn’t work for me as a reader. May be, i misunderstood.

    But I love the imagery and the way the poem is written overall. Thanks for sharing.

    • 6 months ago

      by D.

      No yeah you’re both right about that at the end! It’s pretty unclear but I wasn’t quite sure how to phrase it un-awkwardly - I’ll see if I can edit :) it was I guess too strong of an image of surrender!