My Nightmare

I remember it so clearly,
As if i was there,
I remember your smile when you were happy,
And how your skin was always fare.
I remember your mother screaming,
How could this be true?
I remember your brother telling her,
It’s ok our family will pull through.
I remember my body shaking,
As i read your letter to me,
I remember you telling me not to mourn,
For a soul that had been set free.
I remember how i cried,
I couldn’t hold it in,
I remember reading,
That you thought life wouldn’t let you win.
I remember how i screamed,
I through myself on the ground,
I remember how my mother held me,
Until my cries became sobs and i was sound.
I wondered where the knife was,
The one that you sliced down your arm,
I couldn’t help but wonder,
Whether or not you were calm.
I waited until i could no longer cry,
Until my eyes were out of tears,
I was then ready to die,
Because life was all i had left to fear.
I saw flashes of my future,
Of the way i died,
I took that same kitchen knife that you used,
Because after you were gone all i did was hide.