My Old Self ®

When I "signed" on to this agreement little did I know.
That my own being might not ever again show.
My laughter isn't the same nor is my smile.
Thought it was perfect, at least for a while.
I seem to have lost the very essence that is me.
I feel as though my spirit longs to be set free.
All I hear is what is done wrong.
How much more can I take, for how long?
The stars and the sun seem to have lost their twinkle.
I feel as though my face has grown some more wrinkles.
My age is one that is young to most.
This ride in this life is permanently on coast.
Now the bulk of decision is on my shoulder.
The feeling from this has my heart grown colder.
I can't see the way I used to be now.
Wondering if I can find it again somehow?
Having putting my own happiness on the dusty old shelf.
I wish I could be just again my old self.