I now know what i've lost

I know we had our ups and downs
And I never admitted when I was wrong
But I needed you by my side
You were all that was keeping me strong

I now say I’m sorry
For never being their
For never acting like u were needed
Never showing you how much I cared

But you have to understand
That I found it hard to say
That you are the missing part to me
And I miss you more each day

When you left me
I was torn apart
And I can still feel the empty beats
Of my soft but hardening heart

And the other day when I got that letter
Telling me how you’d gone
I realised how selfish I was
And how I was so wrong

For three years we never spoke
Both too stubborn to give in
But we could’ve had the friendship that we had
If we were both willing

An effort was all that was needed
For us to be best friends again
It killed me when we first split
But now I can’t even describe the pain

For now that you are dead
I will never have the chance
Of regaining what we had
Even though you were happy enough to leave without a glance

I don’t blame you for what happened
We both were in the wrong
But now I know you’re by my side
Making sure that I stay strong