Geez... That's rough shit! Really powerful and dark. Great job!

Thankz for participating in my contest!

Amazing, you truly have a talent, excellent work. Check out some of my poems when you have the time.

Best Wishes
Wallace

:( Well that had my blood boiling from the first moment I started reading it. I think its one of the few things that could get me flying off the rail in an uncontrollable rage - ugly when something causes you to feel that out of control. Im relieved you got out of the situation and it sounds like you're doing well to be getting over him and his f**ked up ways. Good poem... Im going to have to go have a smoke break now to calm my heartbeat! :)

Mo

xx

Whoa...that was...i can't even explain it...but it was good yet very sad...5/5

amandaxx.

OUCH! I felt your anger as well as your hurt. I'm sorry if this poem is about you, but stay strong, I try to. 5/5 wish i could have given you 10

What an emotional powerhouse of a poem. Devastating in its intensity

Um, i dont know how smart it is to critique the Site Owner...so i wont...3/5

Wow. I almost cried.

Ummmm WOW... Great poem lots of angry but your way with words is great

Noelle Wright

I am so sorry for you.. He is a monster..
Nice poem. :)

Very good. It got me crying.

Firstly, I would like to offer my sympathy towards the pain you have endured. It is a tragedy that a person could act so inhumanely towards another and one that, I believe, great reflects the state of the world. I hope you are healing and that you find happiness.

Well, moving on, I would like to comment on your poem as it touched me.

"You f**king b****d
Look what you did
Why don't you kill me?"

These words summarise your poem but by using them, so effectively, as an enterance you grasp the reader's interest almost instantly. One knows, this is going to be an intense, emotion-filled read. The hate in these words stays with the reader throughout your poem.

"Let my bl**dy death
Be upon your raging hands"

These 2 lines are probably my favourite in the whole poem. I feel like you are telling him, 'you have killed my soul, heart and mind, finish what you have began' A very powerful message indeed! I imagine you to be so broken that you have developed a sort of macabre type of courage! There is nothing left within you. Very effective words indeed.

"Why did you stop?
Can you not see?
There is still life
Breathing within me

Why can't you kill me?
Or else let me be
Can you not tell?
I am past broken
From your beatings"

Here again, you are defying him. Almost like saying, "arent you man enough?" I feel that here you re-gain the control and he becomes the weaker being. Almost as if you are slapping him with your words. Powerful.

"My right shoulder
Seems to be your favorite
But then again
Since my surgery
You know that it is my weakest"

This bit touched me quite a bit. He is such an emotionally empty man! He feels the need to subjugate you in order to feel himself as being whole. You tragically portray that and at this point the reader hates him.

"Another fist in my back
Across the face I take another smack
Here a jib there a jab
It feels as though another bone has cracked"

With every line in this stanza the reader cringes! Not again, not again! One can feel your pain, your anguish! Describing it in such an unemotional way reflects the tragedy of it all because it portrays the feeling of indifference, of being used to this. You no longer fear it, it is a routine.

"Please, Father, hear me beg
Let this be it
Let me take my last breath
Please, Father, I plea to thee
Let this son of a b**ch
Hurry and murder me."

Here I feel you give the reader a true insight to yourself. You love God even though you find yourself in this situation. Most would have accepted doom and damnation, blaming themselves for what is happening to them. It is effective and leaves the reader wishing that God will grant her wish.

I really enjoyed this poem. Thanks for writing so honestly about such a painful and torturing experience.

My poem. "I Turned a Blind Eye" deals with the same sort of issue but from another perspective. If you get time to read it, please let me know what you think.

Natalie M. Sarantos

Oh Sher, this broke my heart. I am so sorry you were put through these awful things... and so happy you no longer suffer them.

A very powerful poem that hit me hard.