Cant let loving you show

Lied to myself for so long
Tried to keep my feelings for you to be strong
I loved you, I really did
But there are reasons that forbid
Me and you to be together
We can't, not now, not ever
It hurts me to say it
It hurts me to think it
No matter what I do
I always find myslef thinking of you
Constantly wanting to be with you
Constantly wanting to hear your voice
Because it's a true feeling of rejoyce
But now I realise I have another choice
One thing I still don't get
How do we end it
When it never started
Although it really hurt me when we parted
But now I have to be the first to go
To avoid the pain I know
It's to not let my feelings for you show..