The sketch of me

I have been etched with reality
It’s tattooed on my heart
Even if I am smiling
My heart is crying
Shame is so powerful
It controls my every move, word and thought
It goes to bed with me
And wakes me in the morning
My tongue is stained with lies
It moves with my mind
That can say anything it wants
What is it really like to see color
To feel warmth
Or to feel secure
All these things have gone and I have forgotten
Now things are dull, cold, and venerable
I am so exhausted of feeling this way
I can’t even cry anymore
I ask if maybe I’m just sensitive
Maybe everyone feels this way
I can’t help it
I am still choking on my questions
They will never be answered because no one knows I know