Who Am I?

Trying so hard to understand
A code I need to decipher
Looking at me through the glass
The straining, it makes my eyes hurt.

So many layers to peel apart
So many thoughts to go through
Struggling to see, yet stuck here
Somebody tell me what to do.

How can I truly help him see
If I don't even know myself
Where do I even begin to look
Which book do I pull off the shelf.

I'm sensitive and passionate
Some could say that I'm unstable
But to truly explain who I am
I feel as though I'm unable.

It's time to search deep within
Yet I'm afraid of what I'll find
I'm afraid to begin the journey
Into my complicated mind.

What if I don't like who I am
What if I've always been living a lie
What if there's something wrong with me
Maybe that's why I cry.

I don't think before I do things
I know that much is true
I know I can be somewhat stubborn
Yet I still don't have a clue.

When someone asks for reasons
My mind comes to a blank
On the outisde I appear to be full
On the inside I'm just an empty tank.

I've hurt myself in many ways
I've hurt the ones I've loved
Now I'm back into a corner
I've been yelled at, I've been shoved.

I've reached a crucial turning point
It's time to sit back and assess my life
I need to figure out who I am
And why I cause such hurt and strife.

I want to be able to know
So I can explain it all to him
It's time to dig down deep inside
So tell me where to begin...