My Thoughts

So many thoughts
Running through my head.
I'd pick up my feet,
But they're as heavy as lead.

The mirror reflects the
Body I hate.
As I scan every body part
I analyze what I ate.

The calories add up
In my head,
They're not nearly enough
I should be dead.

The pills that I take
Are supposed to make me feel better,
But instead they don't-
Maybe I should write them a letter.

My feet too big
But nothing I can do
My thighs too fat,
Something I can loose.

My stomach extends
Too far for my liking
And somehow now
I'm suddenly striking.

I cry out as
My fists connect.
My thoughts confused
I collapse.

Blackness comes-
Swimming in and out
I hear screams-but not my own-Those are silent-in my head.

Flashing red & blue lights
Flick in my subconcious
My life drones on
Throughout the night.

Wake up the next morning,
Doctors all around,
"Lucky your here," they said,
"Two more days & you'd be dead."