Dear Diary...

Dear diary
another long day at school
everyone else thinks I'm a fool
i sit up straight and try to forget
about what will happen when i get home

dear diary
again it happened
again i was bashed
again i collapsed
on that hard cold floor

dear diary
i want to know why this happens to me
i want to know why i can't stand being here
i want to know why
i cut myself at night
the crimson feeling of blood by my side

dear diary
my legs are bruised and stomach is beaten
my arms are swollen an my face is bleeding
i want this world to abandon me
i want this world to let me go

dear diary
the blood that's deep
is the blood i need
the scar that keeps
is the one i made
head is spinning with useless thoughts
tonight is my night
can't handle this hurt

dear diary
have you not thought of letting me go
have you not thought of letting me drown
reading through my diary is a reminder of my fears

dear diary...
tonight I'm letting you go
i will cut my wrists so deep down
that i do not feel the pain
then i will tie the rope to the the top of my shelf
and let my body remain

dear diary
i couldn't stand to be hurt that way
i couldn't stand to never be loved
i couldn't stand to live that way
but now i am up above

dear diary
this is my final message
you will stay within my draw
you can my and dads morning wake-up call
they need to know why i did this
they need to know the truth
but still i had to leave

(C) Lucy Green