MY SO CALLED LIFE!!

I live in pain while it rains, with all the tears and fears that i have i pray for
God to heal me now, i live through hell and misery ,i don't know who made me sleep
in that old cold nursery, i lie awake at night, wondering if i had a chance to do what i
wanted, but instead i thought to myself if i was ever wanted ,the hurt and hell my
parents put me through, i wonder if i was ever supposed to be created... i mean who else
in this world goes through what i do....??? here i am half way grown ,ill be 16 next year
maybe this hurt, and pain and fear ,will disappear.... all these childhood memories come
to me while i sleep at night, i don't know what to do because of all the fright, so i close my
eyes and think.... should i die or should i wake?? now here i am 15 ,i am terrified to speak,
my dad is horrible i say i hate him almost everyday, it hurts to do so but thats what
it's like when you live the life i do....... i had friends that i thought were the best but
till this day they couldn't pass a drug test, i hung around them while they did it,
then unfortunately i started doing it too .. but now I'm clean and i have sobered up,
i have moved on and forget about the past .... i know it didn't go by fast but now I have
only 3 true best friends ,one like my mom ,and two are like my sisters , one of them
no names,,, was with the wrong crowed for a while, it seemed every time i seen her she
couldn't smile, she was beaten she was drugged, but most of all the one who is at fault,
was the one she loved, everyone warned her , everyone saw, and the pain in her eyes,
but all she said were great big lies, if she was to tell the truth she was beaten till she
was bruised, it hurts to know your true friend was beaten and sad, he cheated ,he lied,
he beat, he cried, but most of all it was her the whole time...... i love her with all my
heart nothing like him could tear us apart....... so for all those who have had this happen,
open your eyes and realize, get out, move on, everything will feel GREAT!!!!