Weakness Called Her

The crowd cheers Kelly on
As she makes the winning shot
Her teammates rush on to the court
No life could be better than the one she’s got.

Right? On the surface she’s wearing a smile
As not to let her family and friends know
That she’s been carrying a dark secret,
One that she could never show.

They would not understand who she is,
Or why she feels the way she feels
Because after all, she has the perfect life,
Smart and funny with the right appeal.

After the game she went to her room
To vent in her torn up blue notebook
Asked questions like “Why is it never enough?”
Or “Why can’t I be happy with the way I look?”

There was so much emptiness inside of her,
She hated everything she ever knew
So much that she decided that night
That she knew her life was through.

There was no use in waiting
For the pain to subside
Because she was tired of it all
And she was tired of having to hide.

She knew her life would get better
But she did not want to wait
Waiting was not an option
Because she could not see through the hate.

She went to her closet
And reached under the mess
To find a bottle of prescription pills
For her stomach to digest.

She thought one last time
About the pain she felt
Then closed her eyes, and swallowed hard
And felt her body begin to melt.

She opened her blue notebook
To read what she had wrote
Then turned the next page
To write her family a note.

“Dear mom, I’m so sorry for hurting you,
I didn’t mean for it to end this way
I know you loved me for all I was
And in my heart I wanted to stay.

But life asked too much of me
And I was too weak to handle it.
I wish I could be stronger
So I wouldn’t have to do this.

It’s not your fault by any means
Nor is it anyone’s but my own.
I love you mommy, please be strong
And I will leave this earth alone.”

She dropped her pen on the floor
And closed her eyes for the final time.

thanks for reading... id appreciate your comments to know where to improve.