Comments : My Teddy Bear Love Story : Pt. 1

  • 18 years ago

    by natalie

    Oooooh i look forward to the continuation, i like the imagery in it and it was really good :D

  • Yup, I'm also looking forward to the next one, cuz I liked this a lot! I was able to read through it without any errors as well, so you get bonus points for it being written so perfectly ;)

  • 18 years ago

    by Natalie84

    Oh yes, Coonay keep going! (that sounded nasty...HAHAHA)

    KEEP GOING! I love it! It flowed perfectly and was so creative! I'll be looking for the next one.....

  • 18 years ago

    by blackrose1011

    strange way to think of a teddy bear...
    good images, nice ideas. cant wait to read part two..

    ~Breeze

  • 18 years ago

    by SarZz

    hey...dis poem roxxxxxx...izz so cool...simply loved it..keep on writing more....

    pass by my work sumtymes
    adios...

  • 18 years ago

    by Lecrissa

    Its great so far. Let me know when you get the 2nt part done.

  • 18 years ago

    by Mandy Lou

    This is adorable, in a sad way...I think that you should definately continue writing this one! Make however many parts you can manage! You have a really nice start! 5/5!

  • 18 years ago

    by PassingAngel

    yes!! write a part.2!! i love this poem. and i love how it involves a teddy bear. lolz. 5/5 k cyz!
    -PassingAngel

  • 18 years ago

    by xCezx

    cool keep it up! look forward 2 readin da next 1! lv ya cez xxx

  • 18 years ago

    by None

    wow,I deffinately think you should make a part two.It made me feel bad, knowing this person was sad and in need of a hug, but all this person had was a teddy bear..very sweet poem indeed.I will be looking forward to your part two.

  • 18 years ago

    by Britney

    awwl.. so sad! I think you should def continue. You had a great rhyme scheme also.. all flowed very nicely i give it a 5!

  • 18 years ago

    by Patrik

    Also great, but liked Part 2 alot better.

    "Because the next morning,
    waking, not to your scent.
    Etched in the heart of that teddy bear,
    was the story of your last breath."

    I didn't like that part of the poem, feelt kind of misfit to the rest of the story.

    Best wishes,
    Patrik

  • 18 years ago

    by cowgirlstar26

    I've written poems about teddy bears but i've never put them on here I always thought they were dumb I may have to now
    awsome write! 5/5

  • 18 years ago

    by ASPHYXIATED

    Well I know you continued lol you got 3 now :)

    I loved the idea used here and the flow was pretty darn good.

    well done:)

    *gos and reads part2:D*

  • 18 years ago

    by Atomic

    I like how it's short and simple with lots of meaning. =)

    There's only one part that confuses me...

    "Because the next morning,
    waking, not to your scent.
    Etched in the heart of that teddy bear,
    was the story of your last breath."

    Did you mean, he died? I can't wait to read the next one, could reveal something.

    *hopes anxiously to the next poem*

    ( )_( )
    (='.'=)
    (")-(") Arrivederci!

  • 18 years ago

    by Atomic

    Hops*

    Haha....

    Sorry.

    ( )_( )
    (='.'=)
    (")-(") Arrivederci!

  • 18 years ago

    by amelia

    Nice 5/5

  • 15 years ago

    by Yeka

    Awww love your poem truly I do (^_^) 5/5