Hiding

Excellent, I love your style of writing.

i like the way you rhymed it was good. and i agree with ~*Freak*~ "Hiding" would be a good title for this.

Right. The rhyming was well done I think, good job. As for your title..I suggest you pick something maybe about the "hiding". I think the ending was a bit abrupt though. Perhaps you could add a little more..Good job otherwise
~*Freak*~

i really like the concept of this but it would really be better with a title great poem thou love it.....

I must admit that at first, when looking at your age, I wasn't expecting that much. But it seems that you have a tendency to write original poetry, and that's something quite rare among writers. Excellent job on that.

The flow was pretty good for this one. In the beginning, it was actually really good, but the fourth stanza could use some more work. Since you've already set a certain pattern for yourself at that point, you should try keeping to that pattern. All the other stanzas have the same amount of lines, but the flow stumbles a bit at the fourth stanza due to the difference.

Other than that, I am quite amazed. You have talent, and keep the good work up!

Dorotea