Name

I carved your name in my leg
Not because I loved you
But because I was scared you would die
And it would be easier to remember you with that tattoo

I wasn’t proud of what I did
I always tried to hide the word
I was scared what people would say
They would think it was absurd

Now things have gone sour
I found out about your lie
And I couldn’t think straight
I wanted your name off of my thigh

In a fit of anger
And through a shield of tears
I feel something in my hand
And look to see scissors appear

I watched it all through a dream
The blade pressed against my skin
Dragging over your name
And releasing blood from within

Over and over my skin was torn
Until you could no longer read the name
Even though my leg was dripping red
I felt absolutely no shame

As the scissors fell from my hand
I opened my eyes while lying in bed
It had all been another dream
But then I noticed my pants were red

I had really done it
It hadn’t been a dream
My skin was shredded
There was no way for me to redeem

The place where your name used to be
Is now covered in gashes
So the tears I now cry
Turn into my ashes

I watch them slide down my face
Then turn to ash and blow away
Crying these tears is pointless
Like an Atheist who stops to pray