Suicide

My plan is perfect, waiting on my soul for the verdict,
should I fallow through with this whole thing or just desert it,
see I have these pills in my hand, seven to be exact,
holding a tall glass of water, waiting to throw them back,
times up, and I swallowed seven so slow,
hoping that this would be the end and I could finally let go,
as I sat, I thought of You and all things I would miss,
like the last night We were together, or our very first kiss,
as I stumbled to the phone I thought of calling You, but You messaged me first,
happy for just a moment, but what You had to say seemed to make it all worse,
You reminded me how much You really don't care,
not knowing that I was possibly breathing my very last breaths of air,
so I cried vigorously but nobody was there,
so as my body went into shock, I could only think of the smell of Your beautiful hair,
the divinity of Your eyes, Your sanctuarious smile,
the way You laughed and giggled, Your heart wider then the river Nile,
as my body trembled violently I whispered Your name,
bleeding tears of memories, with out You, even death didn't taste the same,
see I've been near death before, but not by my own will,
I was stabbed and shot at, for money, people were ready to kill,
but what I really needed now was You, my Hope, my Strength, my Love my Life,
but at least You know how I feel, as You read this letter tonight,
They say theres one person in the whole world who Loves you more than anything and everything too,
Jaan, before I left I wanted to make sure ...You really knew who.

*I Love You*