Things about me

I cut myself again today
To make the hurt go away
Iâ??m feeling better and it has dampened the sorrow
But I feel this dread about tomorrow

When I roll up my sleeves to wash my hands
Youâ??ll see the marks underneath the bands
I wonâ??t be able to explain my cause of stress
And Iâ??ll silently cry from the helplessness

You wonâ??t scold or angrily chide
Instead youâ??ll keep your disappointment inside
You think Iâ??m psychotic, I do have problems its true
But the choices I make have nothing to do with you

I always thought Iâ??d get over this
I thought I was immune after being so near to Deathâ??s kiss
But here I am again with a knife in my skin
Watching hungrily and the blood comes from within

I still canâ??t believe what he did to me
The pain is still there even though it has slighted to a degree
He is always going to be there in the back of my mind
But I know I will never again be so blind

I have those days where everything seems right
Then I remember her lying on floor and I canâ??t handle the sight
With her eyes closed and a peaceful expression
She broke my heart with her silent suppression

Even now I cannot escape from the suffering
Sometimes I have bruises to remind me of his disparaging
Please donâ??t be worried, it wonâ??t go too far
For if I gave up he would never see how things really are

Iâ??m not exactly sure how I really deal with all this shit
But sharing the burden is something I cannot permit
Iâ??ll keep pretending I can fight my way through
Because if I stole your smile, I donâ??t know what I might do