Crying vs. Writing

I cry and cry till my eyes run dry,
no matter how long I cry
I still feel that hurt inside.

It doesn't want to let me go,
it doesn't want to let me live.

My mom says crying releases your pain,
but no matter how much I cry I never gain,
back that happiness that Ii once had that joy that I once felt.

Crying doesn't work for me it just makes me sadder.
In school I cant remember what I learned that knowledge I just cant gather.

At some points I just want to die, but thinking about how makes me cry.

So I try to put that stuff behind, even though thats how I feel inside.

I write my thought to clear things up,
to vent when I'm fed up.

To sort the good the bad and worse, to rid myself of this curse.