Holding On

I don't know where to start,
My thoughts are in disarrray,
When once I thought I was so smart,
Now my heart is breaking more everyday.

I can almost touch my depression,
And taste my endless pain,
I keep all emotions supressed,
Struggling to keep together my compossure.

To others I lie covering yours,
Make excuses to myself,
I convince myself you need me,
When in reality it's you I need.

Endless lies and countless fights,
But leaving doesn't seem right,
As rough with us it gets,
I can't see you not in my life.

9/23/05