Daranged sadness

by livingwith   Nov 20, 2005


** its not much of a poem, but story more a less**

Deranged with sadness, she can never see her lover again, she can never see him again, The thoughts, a rage inside, all she wanted was to see him, now she cant because of her parents
"How dare they" the thoughts a mere whisper from her lips. The tears, this pain, "how dare they" she screams. Running into her room, her parents scared of what she may do, but she doesnt see them follow her, the look on there face, the tears, the pail look of there skin. She doesn't see anyone, for there is no one with out him. She stops at the wall, the one with dents, and starts talking, to her self, her thoughts spilling out " why," I just wanted to see him" like a broken record she says it again and again, "why I just wanted to see him?" and as she says it again. She screams
"why...?" . But this time her anger spilled out, like an explosion she hits the wall, " why... why?" over and over. Her dad, running over holds her, not to comfort her to save her from her self. Tears running down her cheeks, though as she closes her eye, she opens them because all she sees is him, through the darkness, she opens it because it hurts so bad. Screaming and kicking, her father tights his grip, Though screaming she no longer says why, "only let go, stop... I hate you." Her anger had turn on him, the only person close enough, he was to blame. It was him. he wouldnt let her go, he keeps her from seeing him its him. She turns to her dad. Staring at him. She looks at him, and walks past her mom. Who grabs on to her, but she pushes her off before she could get a grip, and runs out the door. The darkness conceals her running and running, she hides in some trees, sitting on the ground, she hides from all eyes, while holding onto her self. She hides, and prays, what ever will help. She looks up to the sky and tries to figure this out. Tries to make sense of it, of why the one she loves so much is kept from her why "I love him so much; I just want to see him." And with the last words she closes her eyes, and lets her wishes come true.

As he stands in front of her, she pushes all thoughts away, that this is not true. And just enjoys, after all she has nothing to loss. Closing her eyes, she sees him standing in front of her, then bending down and asking her. " what's wrong?" and she starts to cry "I missed you so much, I just wanted to see you" and jumps up wrapping her arms around him, he cant help but loss his balance. And a tear falls from his eyes as he wrapped his arms around her. "I missed you too" Was all he could say. Holding her as if protecting her from the world, and to her he was her world, he was all she needed, all she wanted. "I love you" was what he said, and she tighten her grip in response, and buried her head in his chest, crying so sad, so lonely. She looks up to him shaking, "I miss you, I want you, I want to see you, hold you, be with you, I want to live with you. See you every day." her eyes looking at him her tears still falling. But now as a sudle stream, as a slow bust still flowing, her voice no longer pained but full of compassion. She opened her eyes, looking up to the moon, whispering the soft words, "I love you."

** comment please **

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  • 18 years ago

    by livingwith

    Thanks for the comment and i aprecate everyword of it so thanks lots lol. ANd in truths at the time i had zoned out and was thinking what if something happened that i couldnt see my boyfriend, and i had zoned out. so thats why its so deep. And thanks again

  • 18 years ago

    by Ambar K

    Wow thats really deep. Love can be the sweetest thing or the worst, and you dont know which one you have till its too late. Keep up the good work and keep writing and if you have time check out some of my poems

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