I Can Feel

Im feeling rejected and depressed
Hurtful words thrown at my face
About the things I just confessed
Tears flow

Im feeling lonely and confused
My world is all mixed up
And it makes my heart seem bruised
I walk to the kitchen

Im feeling vulnerable and small
Because you chose her over me
You, the person I desire above all
I find a sharp knife

Im feeling embarrassed and pathetic
That I thought you would like me
Everything you say shows you are unapologetic
I stand in the lounge

Im feeling scared and lost
My thoughts are blurry
The things I feel come at a cost
I hold the knife to my wrist

Im feeling dizzy and ill
I cannot believe what I am about to do
Or what has become of who I am about to kill
I push the knife hard into my skin

Im feeling nauseous and weak
My mind is tossing
What makes her so unique?
Flesh rips

Im feeling alone and miserable
Falling to the floor
As my head hits the table
Blood is spilt

To think that you have caused this
What does that make you?
A killer? A murderer?
An insufficient friend
I am thinking, wondering

And I lay there on the floor
No strength left to move
And I sob as my life
Slowly drifts away from me
Out of my wound

I feel.
I feel rejected and depressed
I feel lonely and confused
I feel vulnerable and small
I feel embarrassed and pathetic
I feel scared and lost
I feel dizzy and ill
I feel nauseous and weak
I feel alone and miserable.

My mind clears
I am thankful
I will go to a safer place
I close my eyes
And exhale my last breath

I can feel.