I dont think anyone can truly see all the pain built up inside of me...why? do i hold it all in at night, laying in my bed i remeber all the fights, people say they understand wen i tell them the things that were being said, they want to help, but what dose that do when im lying down alone wishing i was dead....not letting myself cry forcing myself to show no emotion, and to all my friends if i dont make it to our class graduation please remeber me in our senior movie and jus let everyone kno how much i loved you all, i didnt want to leave you like this but its just me time to go, all the pain kept inside.... well i guess it was time for me to show, please dont be mad at me and please dont cry, im still here for you all and will never leave, never forget the laughs we\'ve had or the times we\'ve had together, and to all my really good friends i\'ll love you all forever, im sorry i had to do this, i dont want to put you through anymore pain than you already have to feel, and just know that our friendships will forever stay real, dont blame yourselves for what ive done, you see ive bottled up somethings for so long that will never go away, i wanted 2 close my eyes and wish all the pain away, but you see in real life wishes never come true, everyday wen we laughed so hard we cried those were really sad tear in disguise, i didnt want to say thing because i figured u didnt want to listen to me complain, i tried my best to fight the pain to make it go away, but it jus wudnt leave me alone, each day i continued pretending everything was ok, but after a while i got tired of the same hurtful feeling, i began pretending to smile and made it look like i thought life was worht while, 2morrows another day and maybe it will b better is something i prayed 4 every day, hoping life would get better, but i realized after a few months or so nothing would ever change and lonly is what i will remain, people have come in and out of my life, but ive never found that missing peice thats been gone for so long, ive always have that empty feeling that no one really cares even thought they really do, sum people show it otheres perfer not to, , no one understands wat goes on in my head but even though im telling u this now i guess its to late because im already dead....
