Deversion (for my unborn cousin)

***** i would appreciate your comments on this poems more than anything in the world***** thank you!

Tuesday December 20. 2005

I wrote this poem for you,
so you could understand...
diversion and craziness of life,
is too much for any man...
i don't know how old you'll be,
when i give this to you...
but right now all i know,
is July 26 is when your due...
boy?? girl??
i have no clue...
i am your cousin little one,
here to protect you,
i don't know what our relationship will be,
if our looks will resemble,
or if you'll hate me...
i just want you see,
it's never that i didn't want you...
its just that you intimidated me,
because you are so wanted...
tried for, and loved by a whole family...
i was a mistake, unlike you...
and that hurts me,
its not that I'm selfish,
or unfair...
but now that I'm here,
i want to soak up all the love i can bare...
all in all its not that bad,
I'll just have to share
but its time to turn the leaf over,
from me to you...
no matter how hard i try,
I'll love you, its true
i want nothing more than to protect you...
Ive made so many mistakes,
that when a new life is formed,
i don't want it to repeat...
i wish i could tell you all thats right...
but the truth is,
i don't even really know...
yeah i know you'll change things,
but hopefully ill adjust...
because its not your fault,
change I must...