But you...loved me ?

by hell*was*full*so*im*back   Dec 23, 2005


I thought you loved me, I guess I was wrong
When you said together forever we will still go on strong
Broken and shattered and left all over the floor
I loved you so much, why do you not love me anymore?

I cried until my eyes were red and my heart was bleeding inside
You never see me unhappy; you never saw the tears I cried
I stood strong and proud and with a gracious smile
Forever the river flows, even through love
Only lasting a little while

I could walk on water, now all I do is drown
I could smile, but now all I can do is frown
You told me you loved me and you let me down!

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Latest Comments

  • 18 years ago

    by ~lost*and*lonely~

    Wow that was great i liked it alot it was a great poem i gave it 4/5 but it was really good you're very talented and i'll like to read more from you

    Love bunches,
    ~Carly~

  • 18 years ago

    by Puerto_Rican_Chick

    I agree with all that xXMyThanatosXx wrote up there.

    as for the last part try putting:

    "I could walk on water, now all I do is drown
    My heart would beat, (and bleeding is all it does now.)
    I could smile, but now all I can do is frown
    You told me you loved me and you let me down!"

    i thought that might help. great poem overall!!!!

    .:*BX Girl*:.

  • 18 years ago

    by xXMyThanatosXx

    You are a good writer, and you don't need someone to tell you that. I like it a lot, but the last verse really stood out to me...

    "I could walk on water, now all I do is drown
    My heart would beat, now all it does is bleed
    I could smile, but now all I can do is frown
    You told me you loved me and you let me down!"

    Each line ends with OWN other then the second line. I believe you should either change the second line to match the rest, or change the fourth line to match the second

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