Fallen

I'm falling again
Falling so hard
How is it that so many people can give it up
But it seems to be engraved in my heart

Every time I get better
And think I can make it
I have to dig out my mask again
Keep pretending to fake it

There's this concrete wall
Between me and normality
I'll always be a freak in some way
Even when others don't see

How I wish I could laugh
And be happy for real
I'm so sick of the way I am
True joy I'll never feel

I used to look in the mirror
And feel good about my reflection
Now all I see is how stupid I am
And how I'll never reach my perfection

Why is it so bad for me to be normal
To actually enjoy life
There's no way I can now
I've been through too much strife

I'll never be good enough
So why should I even try?
I hate to say it again
But I really want to die

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