The Deepest!!

Sometimes i wonder if this is real or just a dream...Sometimes i sit alone in my room and cry to my self and ask what i did wrong but instead i pull out that single razor blade and for each mark on my arm is a mark of my failures! some that are deep are the marks that hurt the most. and the ones just deep enough to bleed are the marks of my depression or maybe the marks of my obsession.....
There is no way to tell if I'm happy or sad when u ask whats wrong i will reply with a nothing but that only makes it my marks hurt worse!!
Inside it kills me not to tell how i feel but my words are bottled up inside and pretend to be happy when I'm sad...That i can convince myself that nothings wrong when inside i know it is but i can't bring myself to say Wat i feel...so call me a cutter or Wat ever you want!! Just know my pain before you cast me out!! I'm just me..thats all i can be...no more ...no less!!!