I feel sad

I sit here, thinking about my life,
I don't feel right, and I do like my knife.
I've been through a lot more then you know,
Not just fun and games out in the snow.
I was so scared, I did not tell anyone what was done to me,
I feel so bad, I hope you see.
The one I love, has let me go,
It's happened before, it's like a show.
I can not bare, I can not sleep,
I sit here alone, I cry and wheep.
I wish I was a better person in this world,
But I see now, I've had my share, and I have held.
I want to forget it all,
But I'm afraid, I will only fall.
My head feels so light,
So let me be, because I hate to fight.
I'm alone everyday,
As I sit here, all I do is pray.