I think this is one of the best poems that i have read i love to sit and read a poem and cry

Great peice, really well written and a great concept.

however, i didn't really understand the line: "My never end" it's proabaly just me being stupid, but i really didn't understand what that line ment.

also the stanzza:
"I gaze upon my everlasting
All see in my sites
Is perpetual fright" somehow doesn't seem as strong as the rest.

"Tick up its sleeve" minor spelling mistake i think did you maybe meen "trick"?

but other than that a fantastic peice effectivly written.

5/5

I don't usually read dark poems; perhaps because I'll relate and I try to keep things buried, even in writing ... however, I did like this one. It carried me along. Nice job. Cheers!

I like the short lines, it adds to the mystery. nice job.

Wow... this is a great piece. Though it starts off as a dark poem, it ends with hope and inspiration. Great write! Keep up the great work! 5/5

Great job! I loved it! It was really an interesting poem! Great job writing! Keep it up!

Interesting use of words, good job. Though the poem doesn't seem to have a constant flow

This is truly a gr8 piece hun xox

Hey there,
this is a great poem, I really like it. It was different.. nothing like ive read before which is good, who wants to read something so similar over and over again, it was a nice change. well it was very well written.. my fav stanza owuld have to be.
As I awoke once more
This time to needles
Hooked up to iv's
I just thought that was quite clever, well take care
Monique
P.S. I would appreciate it if you read one of my poems.. "stolen innocence" or "insecurity" thanks hun