The Lonely Model

by Robert   Mar 20, 2006


Looking at the mirror,
arranging my hair, trying to look good
still I don't like the way I look

the other guys & girls
are making me feel unworthy,
when they don't even know.
they all act as if they're the best,
while I do the opposite

it is my time to go up
I feel so scared
feeling like I'm falling apart
my heart is racing,
it's my turn to start...

now there I am walking all alone
with my head up,
trying to look graceful
still everyone's looking at me as if I'm a disgrace

feeling uncomfortable
in my own clothes,
and in my own skin.
but no one knows the state that I'm in

the judges look at me with a fright,
as if they've seen a ghost
while I'm up there blinded by the lights,
wanting to cry
while no one knows...

I'm off the catwalk, feeling relieved-
I felt so bad up there
when it's what I've been dreaming of...

it felt as if everyone hated me
and it still feels like that...
all of them are congratulating each other
"well done, you've done so well!"
...and there I am all alone,
I did so bad, I feel so bad...

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by Never URs

    I totally understand this poem! you're a great writer! I love your work! keep it up, can you plz comment on mine :) xo

  • 17 years ago

    by Robie Lincer

    Its was really good! i love the way you arraged it too!

  • 18 years ago

    by LadyPearl

    Nice job, clear message. You can still work on your flow a bit. Keep it up

  • 18 years ago

    by Princess09

    Good poem, modeling is a hrad jod you always have pressure to look perfect and no one ever does!! good job tho!!
    ~~Sweetie

  • 18 years ago

    by N J Thornton

    Good job.
    First stanza: Looking AT the mirror instead of IN straight away suggested to me that the subject didn't like his or her own appearance.
    Second stanza: Good, but how about making that last line into two?
    Third stanza: You could have maybe described this with more creativity and suspense, but it's ok how it is.
    Fourth stanza: I liked the contradiction of trying to look graceful and feeling a disgrace, worked well for me.
    Fifth stanza: Liked the rhyme, and the idea of being uncomfortable in your skin.
    Sixth stanza: I liked this stanza, good descriptions and powerful words.
    Seventh stanza: Realisation of being terrified of what you always considered a dream, put simply and effectively.
    Eighth stanza: The pain, the embarrassment, and the loneliness is well portrayed in this stanza, and it is a good way to end.
    An additional suggestion is that maybe you could capitalise every "I" to make it grammatically correct and just neaten it up a tad.
    Well done, keep writing.

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