Pathetic Little Me

I ask Myself why,
why now and why you,
I thought I was done,
I thought my loving was through,
but looking in your eyes,
I feel caught in your gaze,
I try at first to lie,
but its not just a phase,
my friends would call me crazy,
thank God They don\'t know,
they call you a druggy,
they call you a ho,
at times I am dumbstruck,
that my love is so true,
because there are so many women,
but all I see is you,
you party so much,
and fucc everyday,
you play me I know,
and will continue this way,
but I still love you,
not knowing even why,
could it be your drugs,
or the way you pass me by,
or could it be lust,
no its not that lame,
because I've had you naked,
and all I feel is shame,
I always call your phone,
and always the machine,
I cry on my pillow,
pathetic little me,
if I were a real man,
I'd fucc you and be on,
but alas I'm a pu$$y,
so that desire is nearly gone,
for you I'd go to hell,
I'd reach even farther below,
but for me,
you won't turn your head to say hello,
I know you have no feelings,
but I still say that you do,
I'm crazy for your love,
and your crazy for glue,
just please if I can't have you,
which is the way it will be,
then just stay out of trouble,
oh pathetic little me...

plz vote this is my first kind of "love" poem I wrote so I mean well...I'd like to hear your coments. thanks.