My head is floating in circles
So many things I want to say
Not enough time to say them
I just keep thinking about that day
I came to you and gave you it all
You held me close
You made me feel beautiful
I don't know what I am supposed to do
Its hard to describe
Everything I am holding inside
I want you to be mine
I want to hold you forever
But I cant
Theres a wall between us
He holds me at night
I pretend he is you
He isn't you
He isn't the one who held me
He isn't the one who told me
He never made me know
That its OK to love
And that sharing secrets
Isn't something for teenagers
That being myself is more important
Then being a size 5
And that I was perfect
He used to
Let me know that I am loved
But he is always busy now
He doesn't tell me things
Like he used to
Not like you
I don't know what to think
Or what to do
I know that you are special
But you aren't the one
You are the only one
Who listens and cares
Shares with me and feels
What things I need to feel and know and love
I wish I could kiss you and hold your hand
And not worry what everyone around us says
I wish I could keep you
Let everyone know about me and you
But I cant
We cant let anyone know
But even though it is all a secret
You are my friend
And the perfect lover
The one I have dreamed about
You are my forbidden secret
The Handsome #5 with the Ocean Blue Eyes
