I wish you were here II

I don`t deserve
To call you my friend
I`m such a bad person
I let you end.
I thought you were playing
I thought you were pretending
I hope you understood
There was no message that I was sending.
I`m sitting here by your coffin.
The Doc said you were pure,
but You suffered from a disease
That sadly had no cure.
You would cough out blood
You would mourn at night
I wish I was there
To hold you real tight
I could feel your pain now
After you`re gone
I cant believe i wasn`t here
to help you lift your arm.
I`ll never forgive myself
for taking you like a joke
I can`t believe i laughed
While you were the one that choked.
I`m sorry my friend
I`ll probably cry forever
It`s really sad how i never knew
and thought myself as clever
While looking at your picture, your innocent eyes stare.
They make me suffer and wanna say....
how i wish i was there.