I don't belong here
I know that
And it just doesn't feel right
I constantly fear for tomorrow
When I get to face this small town again
Thoughts pop into my mind at odd moments
I hve no idea where they come from
I think of drinking
And wonder if I would have a good time
I think of smoking weed
If I get stoned enough, will my problems float away?
What about sneaking out?
Will I experience ecstasy and forget my problems for an hour or two?
Probably not
And I'm too frightened to look like a fool
The only other way I can safely relieve my stress
Is by smoking a cigarette
I get time to calm down and count to ten
Always, I'm afraid of blowing up at the next person I see
The only way I can keep myself in check
Is thinking of my next visit to my real home
Of seeing my boyfriend, someone who cares
I know I don't belong here
But there's nothing I can do
So I'm going to have to tough it out
Keep my temper under control
And buy myself a couple of packs of smokes
