Hidden in YOU!

I'm sorry, and I blame myself. I always blame myself.

You said that I was pretty, not hot, thats what i always wanted. You wanted me too.

Our hands entwined, you playing my fingers like a piano. You're the first boy I ever TRULY held hands with.

I cared about you. You cared about me too. I thought I was doing the right thing, I KNEW I wasn't.

Now that facade, the one i swept under the rug to save myself, has suctioned back onto me.

Unable to breathe, running through this never ending empty tunnel, covered by beautiful green pearls.

Was I your rebound...or the reason for the split? My neon light shining through the window reading "Young and Naive" must be brighter than usual.

The sting of knowing that without you I feel forgotten kills my talking, walking, smiling corpse a little more everyday. But we knew this caricature would be displayed perfectly.

Everything i see reminds me of you. Crooked trees, scabs, mud.

Nothing.

There is nothing that DOESN'T remind me of you.

Your words pulsate, echo in dead silence. I didn't trust myself with you. I don't know what I'm capable of. You subconsciously pressured me, unknowingly creating noise, not music.

Promise.

Promises are empty. Screaming in the horribly loud silence everyone can see.

You haven't come to visit me on my death bed...I don't know if I want you to.

Do you understand the setting now? This scene is becoming too unpredictable.

My cheek already worn form the 100s of times it's been turned. Now clearly stained by mascara.

Oh My Gwad, how you tangle me, tingle me, and torture me so perfectly. You piss me off, forcing my eyes to leak, making me want you even more. But I'm a tease, remember?

Tease.

That words always confused me. It's been redefined and I guess it's pasted all over me.

I wear you so well, but when I look in the mirror, I shutter at the thought of actually opening my eyes.

I hate reality, and I don't want you back. I just want you. You were my friend before your eyes were imprinted all over me.

Yea...I saw

What we have..had is fatal...and we both know...knew that is why it wouldn't work.

I just want to be free. Free of worry, sadness, frustration, hope, everything.

I wish i could fly...like a butterfly...smooth, soft, and beautiful.

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