To all of my friends.... im sorry!

I don't know why I'm like this
but i wish it would stop
maybe what i deserve
is to sink into a corner and rot

as these cuts bleed then scar
i feel even more afraid
i don't want you to be disappointed
because of the mistakes Ive made

you only see the surface
you don't see whats deep down
and i know if you did
you would surely frown

i hate this fake smile
that i out on each day
to keep my friends happy
this smile is going to stay

i don't care how much it hurts
all this pain i go through
all these cuts i do
i do them to protect you

all my friends i love you dearly
even though it might not show
and i mum i love you to
and i want you to know

it wasn't you who did this
it was only me
and some day soon hopefully
i will at last be free

but today is not that day
that i am going to die
i just cant do that to you
I'm not even going to try

but one of these days i have to go
but i don't want you to frown
because i will always be grateful
for what you did while i was around

I'm sorry i cant take it anymore
all this pain i feel inside
i don't want to do it
i no longer want to hide

so i will say this now
and i will say it true
to all my friends, even when I'm not around
i will always love you!!!