Its Gone Forever Isn't It?

Theres been to much said and done. we cant go back.
all i can do is move on with the memories.
i wish you would have understood.
i just want this to be a nightmare and ill wake up someday and ill be there with you laughing togther again.
i miss the things we did and how i was never upset around you.
you turned my frowns upside down.
you were the only one who ever understood and i suppose i should have apologized before it all went so very wrong.
but as time goes by the memories fade more and more and nothing will ever be the same again.
im losing my sanity.
i miss how it all was before but i suppose some things happen for a reason.
some nights i cryed myslef to sleep and felt like hell.
losing someone so important knowing that they meant so much to you and you meant so much to them and one day it all just changes i never should have reacted the way i did but nothing change the past and all thats left is my screwy new future.
sometimes i wonder if youre thinking of me the way i think of you when im lonely.
i wonder what it would be like if nothing never went wrong between the two of us.
i miss the things we did and how you could help me make it through the days.
sometimes im not sure whether i should hate you or plead for you to come back to me cuz i miss you. nothing is the same now. everyhting just has all the fun sucked right out of it because it reminds me of how we always did everyhting together and the tiems we shared.
i guess in a way this is my apology the apology that doesnt even matter cuz youll never understand and youll never forgive, only forget.
but this wasnt all my fault i know i always apologized for things i shouldnt but this has been bottled up for so long i can bear it anymore.
i always thought i was there for you and you were Always there for me but i just have to move on and forget about my past.
i guess this is just my closure, the closure that ive needed.