Ended Story

I thought it was a great peice.
Well written, with so much meaning.
The imagery was pain provoking and made the poem so much better.
I loved the metaphor of being a story.

Well done keep it up,
Elaine

I truthfully adored it,
It was such a sad piece of work with a purpose. It's up to the reader to catch that purpose

Donno what to say.... (if you hadnt noticed, im catching up and reading all ur poems, and of course commenting)

yet another with so much pain

"I could've changed it,
But I didn't... "

I don't know how you could have changed it, but I do like those last two little lines. A nice closing to the poem, yet sad and thought provoking.

I think you could have used a more interesting vocabulary, it was a bit dry.

"A backround character in my story"

And that line is particularly sad. It's sad because we all have people like that, and it's frightening to think that we could make a difference to their lives - but just don't.
x

The line "Just...hoping that he's know" makes no sense. Is it supposed to be like "hoping that he knows"?

I really like the poem aside from that. The metaphor of life being a story works well here.