My ruined life

I'm living in a Shadow.

Dark and alone.

I don't have anything.

I no longer have my own home.

I sit up at night, trying my best not to cry.

Why do these things happen?

Why am I so alone inside?

Have I don't something wrong?

I've destroyed my self, lost my pride and dignity.

Now, I'm just a nobody.

I don't know who my true friends are.

I don't know If I have any at all.

I'm stuck in this room, with no one to talk to.

I've broken my own promise.

I've Disappointed my self.

Tho so, I continue to fail.

My world is so harsh and cruel.

The only thing in Mind right now is going to school.

I've not only disappointed my self, but I've dissapointed others.

My mom, my dad, even my brothers.

guess I wanted to much freedom.

Now this freedom that I have, is not worth losing the people that I love.

I realize that My friends might not always be there for me.

How stupid could I be?

I was told my family will always be there, through thick and thin, and nobody could give me what they can.

Nobody could even try.

I regret every Mistake I have made.

But this time. . I feel its too late.

I wouldnt even want to face them.

I'm Embarrassed of what I've done.

Ashamed of what I've become.

Hurt b/c of what has happened to me.

sad b/c I'm not at home.

Depressed b/c I feel so alone.

Worried b/c I'm scared I wont make it.

I hate the pain and reality.

I'm scared of losing the person I mostly look up to.

The person I could never fear.

The person that had given me everything.

Mom this is for you.

I love you.

Even tho I may say I hate you.

I could never hate the person who has always been there for me

Until I die. . I will always have you to look up too.