Glaring in the mirror, yes, the full length mirror, where every inch if my disgusting body if on display, on display for my phycotic friends within my head to see. I spit at the reflection, " SCUM " i shout, yes me , the image is not me, no it cant be, where is that heap of obeasity and fear gone? has it be obliviated? or just simply disapeared?
HE is behind me, his rattling putrid breath shakes on my neck, sending impules of detest down my spinal cord. His hands touch, grab, molest my body, yes, a man , CAN YOU BELIEVE IT ?
The way the sweat leaves it\'s ever lasting mark on my skin makes me cringe, shower after shower, will not remove this FILTH from supple body.
I kick the mirror with all strength, i can feel my pointless tears stream down my ugly face, SHUT UP BI*CH, SHUT UP, i scream! with one final punch the mirror disintigrates in a 1000 shards of glass, many of which penertrate my pink flesh, ripping at the capillaries, allowing a torent of blood to drench my clenched and angry fist.
I have fnally broken, the horror has just begun, the curse is released , it is there, waiting to rip my body apart, steal my lungs, steal my liver, steal my mind, steal my herat, steal my bones, steal all it can, to create a new organism.
I scream with all my might, causing my lungs to explode with pressure, pulling at my hair, grabbing at my chest, i will rip my heart from my flat chest this instant, in attempts to relase my self from this labirynth of anger and madness, HERE have my hearty have it, eat it, burn it, rip it into a million pieces and distrubute it to the world of ignorence, please, do it , just to give me lasting satasfaction.
Thankyou, no really THANK YOU! you have taken all i have, destroyed it and handed it back, whilst you recieve your weekly orgasim, your weekly binge drinking rally, im here, retrieveing all the piecies of this puzzle of anger, i am here, trying to find the road to happiness, seeing the satasfaction in her eyes, the way she stands there, secretly laughing at the fact she has won, cracked me, the fact she has lost nothing, and only gained, caused my blood to boil at an unhealthy rate, GO ON , HAVE A HEART ATTACK!
The alcohol floods my senses, all shuts off at once, just how i want it, no one can hurt me here, not even god himself, if there is such a master. Life has finally ended for me, i am living only phyically, i have no soul.
My soul was ripped form inside me years ago. This deciosn is crucial, is it worth living? is there a reason for me actually living anymore? or am i here out of pure care for others? I am not helping my self by reaming on this demension.
My rage is taking the better of me, its grips are now controlling me, i can here the wlal begging to be touched , i can feel my face twitching from its depserate pleas to be touched with my rage.
Fists in control, the wall is attackecd and so is my disgusting body, take it, deal with it, live with it, what ever, yea. Goodbye cunts, thankyou, for my destruction, thankyou, for subverting my sainity. I appriciate it.
