Very dramatic, a good pace and flow, a few errors here and there tho, i think the second line should be 'disgusted' not 'discussed' and the last line of that stanza - 'the man who beats me' not 'beets'.
a long poem but it kept me interested all the way through, it is very moving.
There is a spelling error with 'beets,' should be 'beats.'
Overall I enjoyed this piece, parts of it sounded slightly cliched but the rhythm and rhyme was good and kept up throughout. I particulary liked this stanza:
'Feel guilty that I ate today
Of each crumb I feel aware,
But the dizziness and hunger
Had become too much to bear.'
Firstly because the flow was good and also because it was just a subtle hint at an eating disorder and not to overpowering, however still very effective.
Nice work :)
Wow... im left speechless....it was such a great poem *masterpiece* i cant believe how everything was so....i dont even know how to say it. It made me think alot.. but definetely this was a really really great poem. So many feelings of sorrow, sadness...
well still it was great keep it up!
really sad and ful of emotion !
at first i thought it was cutting but then it turned out to also abuse, i thought that was really good and sad
carry on writing !
love your work
mex x x x x x