My silent struggle

My struggle
Is long and hard
It always seems to strike me
When I'm completely off guard

Nothing is right
Nothing is worth it
It's a habit
Too hard for me to quit

I have to be beautiful
Incase you forget me
I have to be gorgeous
And the girl I want to be

My thighs bulge
And my stomach extends too far
My head is the wrong shape
And my shiny friend has left another scar

But I can't do much more
I can't stand another night of all the tears
So I'll eat just to keep the peace
I'll be gorgeous in a couple of years