I try to close my eyes and sleep
but your face haunts my dreams
(I feel like Iâ€™ve been torn apart...
Iâ€™m broken at the seams)
I agree with above people, the lenght did not bother me as my were jsut glued to the screen, waiting to read more and more [if that makes sense] anyway great poem! im just left speechless! Just WOW! really an amzaing piece of work!
And Im very sorry if this really did happen to you as i can imagine myself in the same position, jsut the though of it fills my eyes with tears..i hope everything gets better
Anyways Beautiful poem! Keep It up! [5/5]
Amazing . Though it was long, it didn`t bother me , but it took a long while to read . Maybe split it ? Like how some people do part one, two, three, etc . But besides that, i liked this . Amazing poem (: I`m just speechless . And if this happened, i`m sorry .
I LOVED this.
Even though it was so long, you kept my attention all the way through it, I didn't want it to end, and even when it did it didn't dispappoint.
Everything about this is perfect.
The imagyer, the flow, the rhyme scene, the wording.
All of it is pefect.
This is my favourite poem I have read on this entire site.
A truly excellent poem, and a well deserved 5/5 from me.
WOW! This was amazing hun. The flow was great, the emotion was so clear, and the descriptions were excellent. It kept me hooked from start to finish but it is a little bit long. I agree with Minh Dee in that maybe you should make it into more than one poem. This was very well done, keep up the awesome work! 5/5
Awh wow !! This was awesome! The emotion you put into it was unreal, the flow, the descriptions, just everything was great. It was extremely long but you got me hooked from the beginning. Wonderful work! 5/5
Wow...I started reading and couldn't stop...This is filled with so much strong emotion and pain-You did an amazing job with every aspect of this piece; such a heart felt poem...5/5 Keep it up, you have so much talent
ARG! I just wrote up this incredibly long and helpful comment, but then my computer got messed up and deleted it all! Ill just summarize briefly because my patience with my computer has vanished.
Absolutly amazing poem! There were a few places where the flow had to be adjusted. I remember one thing: In the ninth stanza, I would replace blankly with "vacantly"-- It would flow better... At one point in the poem the word "that" is repeated... Also, I think this line: -- thought he'd broken my heart..." should be changed to "--thought he broke my heart" --- and in the letter towards the end, the word "rip" is spelled as "ripe"... I can't remember what else I wrote... But the poem, in its entirety (sp?) was incredible!
Suicide iz a sad, sad choice to make. 1 of my closest friendz commited suicide after 3 of dem got murderd. "RIP to ur friend n God bless" I really enjoy reading ur poemz. I only dream of bein as good as u. Keep ya head up n stay close to God.
Wow.... You Are So Amazing!! Can You Tell Me Was THis Poem True Or Made Up? Your poem was beyond excellent. There's not enough words in this world to tell you how good that poems was. The lengeth did not bother me at all. You are such an amzaing writer. Anyways Please Get ahold of me sometime I would like to get to know you much better. Much Love
This ia one amazing poem it keep me on the edge of my seat the whole time and it is so sad and yet so lovely all at once and it brought tears to my eyes that ppl who have problems like he had have to kill them selfs for the feels worthless I have a good friend who cuts and all so I know how that friend felt keep the great poems coming 5/5 all the way
This is the longest poem I've ever read but sometimes when we write we feel we can write forever even about one topic. The poem was long but fantastic aswell, it was kind of like a story, with 12 chapters lol. I loved how it had so much emotion and so much meaning. Love is really something special and we should never take it for granted because it could all be gone so fast and we'll never have a chance to say goodbye. I thought the poem was fantastic overall and you did an amazing job on it 10/5 if I could keep up the excellent work
I actually read this whole poem even though i would never normally read one this long. this is such an amazing poem, it has so much depth i loved the structure of the first bit with the brackets at the end of every stanza. it was amzing, you have such talent, i loved this so much well done.
Wow, what a powerful poem! that brought me to tears! i really had no idea that was where you were going with it, wow that letter just really topped it off... i loved the poem, it really was an exceptional write, wonderful job. 5/5 definitely
WOW!! I'm speechless... Excellent write. I sincerely hope that this is fictional, though with the emotions that flowed through the poem, I have my doubts... so I'm truly sorry about your loss. This poem is so emotional and powerful that it can only be written from the bottom of your heart. I loved the style of writing and how you kept it throughout most of the poem - from reality to your thoughts. There's one minor typo "I try to close my eyes and srleep" should be "sleep". Otherwise, exceptional write - 6/5
Wow, was this ever a heart wrenching write. The flow and meter, the rhyme and cadence were superb. The content, astounding and the emotion and depth compare to nothing I have read in a long time. The imagery, also spectacular. I love this poem, even though it brought tears. Beautiful job. Best wishes, and blessed be.
Very well written poem Stephen....I enjoyed reading it....especially the surprise ending. I thought you did a nice job with the rhyme scheme and it was interesting the way you spoke to yourself at the end of each verse.
This is so amazing. It's very beautiful, but so sad. It brought tears to my eyes. The length didn't even matter.. once you start to read, you're just so drawn in by it, you don't even notice how long it is. You did an amazing job on writing this. I loved how you added the letter into it. & The paranthesis, really brought the poem out. Amazingly perfect.